Dear Natural Selection,
I am writing to personally thank you for a development in human anatomy that I am particularly grateful for today: the nasal septum. When did you come up with this little bit of cartilaginous genius? Was it a just a hop, skip, and a leap once you'd settled on bilateral symmetry? Well, I suppose it must seem kind of like old hat to you so many eons later, but I just wanted to let you know that I still appreciate it.
Of course, I could do without the bugs that are holding their own bacterial Glastonbury Festival in my sinuses. They are partying at all hours and making quite a mess. Could you kindly direct me to whomever invented "glamping"? Because I've got some other words for that fellow. These bacteria are getting faaaaaaarrrrrr too comfortable in there.
But at least I can breathe out of one of my nostrils. It was a really good idea for us to have two of them. Thanks for that.